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Daddy Are You Listening Book Launch Featured Image

New Book Announcement: Daddy Are You Listening?

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When do good listening skills start? In the home, when you’re a child, in grade school or college, or is it in the workplace?
 
Listening Starts in the Home
 
In my experience, as a parent and a professional, listening starts in the home, and then your skills increase as you learn, grow and get more involved in your work. As I interact with colleagues and clients, most successful professionals want to listen closely or mention the need to be a better listener.
 
For decades, I’ve been educating professionals to tune in and actively listen to the people around them. However, you can practice listening skills early on with your family members; your first listening skills test that’s a two-way street. Not only are you listening to family members, but they are also listening to you. 
 
Active listening means you stop, look, and ask questions so you can understand what’s going on. When you do, you can help your children or any family member navigate different emotions. Listening, caring and understanding, especially, help children as they branch out on their own and form relationships outside the home.
 
Focusing on Listening in a New Children’s Book
 
Today marks a milestone and an important day, as my husband and co-author, Mark Skrobola, and I launch our third children’s book in the Whisper From Noelle Series. Book #3, “Daddy Are You Listening? Another Whisper From Noelle,” is our way of showcasing the importance of listening and learning how your children feel.
 
Stop Look Ask : Daddy Are you ListenignDaddy Are You Listening is dedicated to all the Moms and Dads who listen, or who are trying to listen. In the book, the main character, Ashley-Ann, is upset her daddy isn’t listening. Her angel friend, Noelle, who visits her frequently, whispers in her ear that her daddy is trying to listen. Trying isn’t good enough. Ashley-Ann has to help him be a better listener. That beautiful day in the park was when Ashley-Ann learned about listening and why it’s so important. Our new book, and the first two in the series, are available on Amazon and Barnes & Noble. You can also check out our story and why we wrote the Whisper Series on our website.
 
Giving with Each Book Sold
 
Noelle Skrobola Outstanding research Scholar AwardAll of the proceeds from Daddy Are You Listening? go to charity. We’ve teamed up with the College of New Jersey (TCNJ) to award one or two students per year with a fund to help further their psychology research. TCNJ initially set up the award in memory of my stepdaughter Noelle, who unexpectedly and tragically passed away in 2018. Noelle was the first recipient of the award, which was later named, The Noelle Skrobola Outstanding Research Scholar Award.
 
We hope you’ll check out Daddy Are You Listening and share our book with your families and friends. Listening is one of those critical skills, important for family members, as they support one another. 
 
Listening is the first step to building a solid relationship and a foundation of trust in the home or the workplace.
 
Here’s a little bit more about our Whisper Book Series …
 
 
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Four Questions to Ask Your Mentors About Their Ethics & Values

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A situation stands out in my mind from 20 years ago. At my agency, one of our senior leaders had misreported the marketing campaign results in his presentation to the client. When the error was discovered, there were other leaders at the firm who made excuses for him. I heard everything from “oh, he’s a good guy” and “what’s one little white lie” to “a tiny exaggeration doesn’t hurt anyone.”
 
There was a time when I looked at the leaders around me and just thought they were all honest, transparent, and spoke from a place of “Do Well by Doing Good.” Whether the leader I remember from 20 years ago was lying, or as his peers stated, simply exaggerated the numbers, it made me step back to think about the situation, and what it meant to have shared ethics and values. 
 
To this day, each and every one of us should take the time to step back and reflect, especially when our ethics and values are challenged. Of course, ethics and values are a personal choice and a business practice. Personal is just that … it’s personal and may differ from the professionals around you. However, it’s important to see eye-to-eye with the people who are in your inner circle and who are your trusted advisors.
 
You must trust your mentor as you trust your urologist who writes you a prescription for erectile dysfunction pills.
Here’s when your mentors’ ethics and values really matter. As I mentioned in my book, Answers For Ethical Marketers,” early in my career, I thought my ethics and values were naturally baked into the professionals around me. However, it’s important to ask questions and to make sure your mentor’s values and ethical conduct are aligned with yours, as it creates a stronger bond and a long-lasting relationship.
 
What questions can you ask when selecting a mentor to make sure you’re both on the same ethics and values page? My video shares four of these questions. Please share the questions you would ask too!
 
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FEEL First Student Contest Winners to Be Named in January 2022

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Each semester, I visit different university and college classrooms (virtually) to share the research behind the FEEL model and the FEEL First online test. Before the students dive into the model and the study findings, I’m quick to point out that the road to FEEL (facing Fears, engaging with Empathy, living with Ethics and unleashing Love) starts early and long before you begin your professional career.
 

In the fall semester 2021, I had the honor and pleasure of meeting Professor Jason Mollica’s Strategic Communications class at American University. The FEEL model and FEEL First test online became a part of their semester-long project.
 
The goals for the students were to learn about the FEEL model and take the online test to discover their levels of FEEL in their communications and interactions. Then, the students reviewed the data presented in the FEEL ebook on how different generations face fears, and related all of the information presented to their own experience and communications.
 
 
 
As I expected, the students approached FEEL differently, writing blog posts and creating infographics based on their experiences. Professor Mollica and I created a contest, so three students, who wrote strategically (applying what they learned in class) and who embraced the FEEL model, would be the winners featured on my PR Strategies blog.
 
We’ve selected these three winners, and they’ll be announced in January 2022. What a great way to start the New Year, with a FEEL First approach to communication and relationship building. Stay tuned for the winners, which will be coming soon.
 
I’d like to thank all of the students who participated in the contest and Professor Mollica, who is a friend, colleague and always a huge supporter of my work.
 
Here’s to much more FEEL in 2022!
 
Featured Image: Photo by Giulia Bertelli on Unsplash
 
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Three Tips to Building Your Ethical Marketing Foundation

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The road to ethics and values is ongoing. You don’t stop shaping your values or reflecting on your ethical conduct as you develop personally and professionally throughout your career experience.
 
Ethics and values go where you go; down every road and they’re with you at every crossroad. At the same time, as you travel this road, you my be challenged with different situations that you haven’t experienced earlier in your career and scenarios that you didn’t learn about in school.
 
As a result, you need a solid framework for decision-making; one with ethics and values at the core of how you think, communicate and how you act. In this video, you’ll learn my three tips to build your strong ethical marketing foundation.
 
Be sure to weigh in on how you have built your ethical marketing foundation and what guides good judgment in your decision-making and communications.
 
If you want to learn more about being an Ethical Marketer, which everyone is today, then you can check out my book, Answers for Ethical Marketers, here.
 
Enjoy the video and the tips!
 
 
Featured Image; Photo
by Karsten Würth on Unsplash
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How Different Generations Face Fears [FEEL First eBook Part I]

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It’s here! I’m launching the first ebook in a four-part series, all based on the data and analysis of the results from the FEEL First Test online.

Here’s the “Why” Behind the FEEL Test …

The FEEL First Test is part of an ongoing passion project and research experiment. When my stepdaughter, Noelle, who was a Millennial, passed away in September of 2018, I wanted to know what Millennials were thinking and feeling.

Many questions crossed my mind. Rather than guessing, I set off on a research journey gathering qualitative data from over 100 interviews with Millennials. At the time, I didn’t realize I would be analyzing and using the data to build a communications model, an online interactive test, and a roadmap to help professionals be present, self-aware and more tuned into and self-reflective of their interactions.

I wanted to know from Millennials, who were born between the years 1981 and 1996, the answers to these questions:

  • How do you show up to your conversations?
  • Are you sharing your authentic self?
  • What do you value?
  • How do you want to be perceived?
  • How do you want the leaders / supervisors, managers and mentors in your life to communicate with you?
  • What do you look for from a leader, supervisor, manager or mentor?
  • What do you look for in a relationship?
  • What does it take to build trust with people, whether you’re on social media, at your company or in any setting?

The 100+ Millennials I spoke with had more to say than I had ever expected or imagined. The one-on-one interviews scheduled for 15 to 20 minutes started to turn into 60 and 90-minute conversations.

I encouraged the flow of the discussions and the transparent sharing of stories and feelings. Some of what I heard enlightened me, and the process was eye-opening to say the least. At the same time, what was shared was jaw dropping and unsettling, which led me to ask another very important question. 

Do you ever really know how someone feels? 

The Millennials I interviewed told their stories with passion and from the heart. They stated exactly what they were thinking and feeling. It was then I realized, in order to tune in, and truly embrace the verbal and non-verbal cues shared daily, you have to be present and aware in each and every moment. Those interviews and those moments really opened my eyes.

When I stepped back to record the data from the conversations, I saw an interesting pattern develop. Four buckets quickly emerged based on the stories, the sentiment and the insights shared for the questions I initially asked. Clearly, and overwhelmingly, the Millennials wanted the people around them (with a focus on their leaders, supervisors, managers, etc.) to:

  1. Be more open and inclusive, which meant they had to face FEARS.
  2. Show kindness, be understanding and have EMPATHY.
  3. Live with truth and transparency and show good judgment, living with ETHICS daily.
  4. Have passion and show it by unleashing their LOVE for important causes and standing up for what they believed in.

For me, those four buckets, and understanding each one, has become a life purpose and an ongoing passion. They spelled a word that can make a difference in your personal and professional communication. The word is: FEEL.

If you apply FEEL or feelings, at the point of every interaction, and each communication you encounter, then you are more likely to deepen your conversations and move toward genuine relationships. 

The word FEEL has changed my life and career journey, and it’s the lens through which I evaluate my communications. Applying a FEEL lens to your connections and communication helps to build trust, loyalty and advocacy with every interaction.

Having Emotional Intelligence (EI) means understanding your own feelings/ emotions and reactions. So, I ask you …

  • Are you self-aware? 
  • Do you have self-discipline? 
  • Do you exercise self-management?
  • Are you also self-reflective? 
  • Do you manage your own emotions, so you can tune into and handle/manage someone else’s? 

Pondering the questions further, I realized there was no test to evaluate whether you FEEL first, before you engage in communication with the people around you.

Of course, evaluating your level of FEEL or how open, inclusive (and not fearful you are), empathetic, ethical and passionate toward a cause, is not just for Millennials. It’s for all generations and every human being. 

As a result of my qualitative research study, which focused on Millennials, regardless of your gender, age, generation or profession, the FEEL First Test came to life with a goal to help you realize how you feel about yourself, the people around you.

    After collecting over 9,100 answers from about 350 test participants between February 2020 and February 2021, I’ve created the 1st ebook you can download with findings from the FEEL First Test.

    To get your complimentary copy of the ebook, How Different Generations Face Fears, you can fill out the brief form and download below.

    Download The Feel First Test eBook
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    Book Announcement: Answers For Ethical Marketers Published as a Guide to Good Business Communication

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    When I started my public relations and marketing career journey, I thought ethics and values always entered the equation. Every professional, journalist, and media outlet practiced ethical conduct. Naive, I know!
     
    What I’ve learned quickly, and, in some cases, with a big lesson attached, is that ethics and values are a personal choice and a professional practice. Defining your values and applying your good judgment in decision-making goes with you, down every road and at every crossroad. You do not leave your values at your company’s doorstep and automatically adapt their “best practices.” Suddenly, the ability to pause, question, involve smart people in decisions, and course correct are critical actions. Upholding the standards of truth, objectivity, accuracy, fairness, with a “Do No Harm” approach is also what you want to rely on every day. This way, at the end of your day, your integrity is still intact.
     
    Answers For Ethical Marketers Released  in April 2021
    Now, there’s a book with personal stories, shared experiences with business thought leaders, and plenty of questions asked and answered about ethical conduct in communications. I’m excited to announce I’ve collaborated with Routledge Publishing to release my book, Answers for Ethical Marketers. It’s the 2nd book in the ‘Answers’ series after releasing Answers for Modern Communicators in 2017.
     
    My new book is just the beginning of pressing conversations about ethics and values. Some we’ve had in the past and other discussions that are new due to ever-changing technologies and the evolving media landscape.
     
    Breaking Down the Book
    As for the writing process, there was plenty of fodder for the pages of this book. I wrote it during a global pandemic, the 2020 Presidential Election, and, at a time, when there was racial violence. Yes, challenges lie ahead, and leaders need to be ethical role models. They should be setting an example for their employees, customers and the other stakeholders they serve. However, is it just leaders and their communications teams responsible for ethics in communications?
     

    Who is the Ethical Marketer? Well, it’s you, whether you’re a marketing / PR professional, a business person, or anyone in the company who is communicating and sharing about the brand. That’s a wide range of professionals.  There are opportunities and challenges when it comes to ethics and values permeating every level and position in an organization. Answers for Ethical Marketers breaks down the landscape. The book starts by probing the ‘essentials’ of what Ethical Marketers need to know.

    Some of the chapters include:

    • Applying ethics through media channels in PR, digital marketing, and social media programs.
    • Delivering ethical communication through cause marketing.
    • Taking ethics into media interviews.
    • Learning the actions steps of leaders who are ethical role models.
    • Identifying your ethical mentors. 
    Moving Forward With Ethical Marketing
    I look forward to the discussions, passionate perspectives, decision-making processes, and highlighting the professionals demonstrating ethical conduct that speak to truth, transparency, integrity, and the character professionals need to uphold in their communications today. Yes, words matter, yet actions will always speak louder than words. At the same time, I realize we’re all human, and mistakes will happen. It’s what you do with the learning moments and how you move forward with action steps knowing that you “Do Well By Doing Good.”
     
    Answers For Ethical Marketers is a compass to guide you, and a resource to help you tap into your inner “Ethics GPS,” regardless of your organization, position, or the situation at hand.
     
    Here’s my video explaining the book and launch. If you’re interested in learning more, you can check out Answers for Ethical Marketers here.
    Buy The Book Here

    Answers For Ethical Marketers Book Announcement

    FEEL First Blog Post

    Creating Meaningful Connections Through Emotionally Intelligent Communication

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    My public relations/communication students and I have been discussing soft skills, including emotional intelligence (EQ), for several years.

    More recently, the topic has come up in the context of relationship-building, specifically the role that EQ can play in building trust to create authentic, meaningful connections between organizations and diverse audiences. In the spirit of experiential learning, I wanted to turn these conversations into hands-on development opportunities.

    Around the same time, I was speaking with Deirdre about her FEEL approach to communication. After learning more about her research and how it relates to EQ, I piloted an optional assignment in an upper-level, strategic communication course.     

    Assignment Overview

    There are three basic components to the assignment: 

    • Take the FEEL First test and obtain your score.
    • Review the suggestions, identify one and put it into practice.
    • Write a brief reflection paper regarding the experience.

    Students had about two weeks to do the work. They weren’t required to share their scores but rather consider what they learned as a result of the experience.       

    A Student Perspective

    One student who completed the assignment, David James, a current UMass Amherst senior and communication major, felt that it was a personal confidence booster, as well as a jumping off point to better understanding public relations. He mentioned the importance of empathy, particularly for those who serve as chief relationship agents, to be able to “FEEL others’ thoughts, opinions and emotions on both a macro and micro level.” 

    David, who is also taking business courses, shared that, “I might not have even appreciated that enough while learning it, but in hindsight now, it covers how we should always go about the PR process. Even in the most high-stress crisis comms situations, PR efforts would benefit from a step back, a deep breath and feeling out how each target public might perceive the organization’s message.”

    Overall, this exercise provides an opportunity for continuous learning; one that’s designed to encourage taking a more human approach to communication to enhance interpersonal and organizational relationships.

    Jennie Donohue is a Senior Lecturer & Director of PR Curriculum, UMASS Amherst.

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    The FEEL First Pledge: A Commitment to Communication & Relationship Building

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    How you FEEL determines how you communicate. It doesn’t take a scientific study to know this or to watch your emotions play out on social media. Think about how your feelings translate into actions, reactions and the words that come out of your mouth (or the words in your tweets and/or your Facebook posts). If you’re an optimist, then you will communicate as such. The same goes if you’re the opposite. As a pessimist, your communication would reflect this too. Take on any mood and it is likely your communication relates to how you feel. Now, think about this statement: Why wouldn’t you want to study, understand and improve your feelings, so that they play out positively in your communications and the relationships that result.
     
    Optimism Helps Your Communication
     
    As I sit here with the book, The Optimist Creed and other Inspirational Classics by Christian Larsen, both his book and his Optimist Creed (which is pinned to my wall) remind me of all that’s positive in my daily thought process and interactions. Being positive about others, having peace of mind, finding health and happiness, letting go of mistakes and moving forward toward future achievements are just a few of the elements of the Optimist Creed. Many of these ideals are learned early on in childhood and through years of life experience, family guidance, an educational system, and societal norms, they are adhered to or not. Hopefully, the former is true and you are a living testament to the Optimist Creed.
     
    For Your Relationships: A Pledge for Better Communication 
     
    However, what about your communication? Do you pay close attention to what you communicate daily, from the time you wake up in the morning until you lay down at night? Do you have a responsibility to yourself and to the people around you to care about the consequences of your words as they travel through your favorite channels, in any given moment? To my knowledge there is no Communication Checklist or Communications Pledge that you can print out and hang on your wall or post on your refrigerator. If there is, I haven’t seen it yet. Having the Optimist Creed on my wall is a reminder to me every day to strive for better and to keep a healthy and positive attitude. Having a Communications Pledge on my wall would be just as helpful.
     
    I’ve been working on the FEEL First model for well over a year. My team has been diligently gathering data from a FEEL First test online that is scoring how much or how little professionals Face Fears, Engage with Empathy, Live with Ethics and Unleash Love. There are well over 6,000 answers in our database. From everything I’ve learned from my research journey, when you FEEL First you have a better opportunity to understand and manage someone else’s emotions too.

     

    FEEL First Model
     
    Of course, your ability to FEEL takes constant work … it’s a journey to be more open and to face what makes you uncomfortable. It takes a clear and present mind and heart to be more inclusive of others. It’s harder than you may think to be empathetic when sometimes you may only be touching the surface and you don’t even t know it. It’s not as obvious as you think to live with ethics and good judgment, when little white lies are a way of fooling your brain into larger transgressions. Lastly, if you’re not a demonstrative communicator it may be difficult to let the passion lord or the love flow.
     
    However, the more you practice and also make a commitment to yourself that you can and will FEEL First in your communications, you will slowly move closer to this approach through all of your channels as you deepen your relationships.
     
    The FEEL First Pledge
     
    I mentioned earlier not having a Pledge or a Creed in communications until now … I’ve created a FEEL First Pledge as a reminder that collectively we need better communication. Practicing or saying a pledge daily will help you to move toward greater purpose through your thoughts, words, and actions to create positive impact. Having a Pledge, during an election year, the Coronavirus pandemic, and racial injustice that’s playing out across our county is necessary and needed now. If relationships are based on trust, then your communication is either the bridge that can help others or hurt them. 
     
    Where Do We Go From Here?
     
    Words matter more so now than ever. So join me in a Pledge to FEEL First and a commitment to share communication that helps your neighbors, family, friends and colleagues and takes your communication to a new level so you can make a difference. You can download the the FEEL First Pledge below.
     
    Click image to download the FEEL First Pledge.
    Click image to download the FEEL First Pledge.

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